Wordplay

I love puns! And this one combines my love for old-school 90's ballads with politics. Check out the 18-second punniness below.

Leave the light on

I just got a 2009 State of the School address email from our school's dean.

Dear Colleague,

I would like to cordially invite the students, faculty, staff, and our clinical affiliates to attend the 2009 State of the School address.

This past year was highlighted by significant success in all our focus areas: research, education, and service to our community. It also marked the beginning of an exciting and ambitious plan, in partnership with our clinical affiliates, to become one of the country's preeminent academic medical centers.

More recently, the downturn in our economy and financial markets has challenged us to review our financial health and plan carefully for the future. The good news is that our financial position relative to our peer institutions remains fairly strong.

This is a sample of the topics I plan to address on February 25th. I hope you will be able to join me.

I'm so glad that our exorbitant med school tuition is going somewhere. In fact, as long as we can hold on to the "most expensive Chicagoland medical school" title, I think we're all going to make it through. It also deeply reassures me that you had the foresight to increase our tuition 7-10% every single year for the past decade. I only wish you had told the rest of us that the economy was going to go down the crapper.

Loss for words

Sesame Street spoofing Law and Order:SVU.



Dude, who would have thought that Sesame Street would bring the funnies better than SNL?? This is awesome. I love the puppets. And the chung chung-ing.

Stop and stare

I was walking home the other day, enjoying the gorgeous weather and the fact that the roads weren't completely covered in snow and ice with a nice pair of strappy heels. And then, up ahead a block or so, I saw my friend Neil. Now, I hadn't seen him in what seemed like ages, so I started to pick up my pace, thinking that I could give him a running hug, or at least the biggest scare of his life.

So I'm running after my friend Neil, with my heels announcing my imminent arrival...

Click. Clack. Click. Clack. CLICK CLACK CLICK CLACK CLICK CLACK.

I was running by this time, and then once I was about ten feet away from Neil, I realized that it actually wasn't Neil at all, and so I came to a screeching halt.

Realizing that Not-Neil had clearly heard me running and then come to an abrupt stop right behind him, I hurriedly dug out my phone so that I could pretend to be oddly intrigued by my nonexistent text message when he turned around. And yes, turn around, he did.

Because honestly, what else are you supposed to do in that situation? I had thought to keep on running by him, but when would I stop? At the grocery store? A random hotel lobby, perhaps? But I was wearing heels, and getting progressively short of breath, so I opted for the abrupt stop and the obvious stare-at-phone-for-no-reason-at-all maneuver.

I need to make an appointment with an ophthalmologist. Seriously.

Also, I need to stop assuming that Neil has the only red and gray North Face jacket in the world.

Syrup and honey

A ghost of a chance

There's been a lot of talk of The Future in recent days. Fourth year med school friends have all finished interviewing, and are now deciding their final rank lists. Third year med school friends all now have a pretty good grip on what they want to do for the rest of their lives. And for me and my fellow second year classmates, well, we have that gigantic test coming up in a couple of months.

This is usually where I would start panic-attacking in prose about said test, but I'm gonna take a little breather and skip over that part.

[Inhale deeply, grab a brown bag and hyperventilate.]

Now, why is this exam so important? After all Michelle, you pretty much know what specialty you want to go into. So why does it matter where you end up, as long as you're doing what you love?

Because it matters.

And here's where I let you in on a little known secret. I tell people that I want to go back to California. It is my dream to go back back to Cali Cali, where the sun is always shining and the people are always smiling.

That's already a pretty big dream. California.

That's why I never tell anyone that I would be beyond happy to end up in New York too.

It doesn't make any sense, really. The weather is terrible, the sun's blocked out by buildings, and no one smiles. But I spent one glorious week there, and fell in love.

(see the rest of the I LEGO N.Y. series here)

California is already too much to dream for. To wish for New York too would just be greedy.

So there it is. Can't think it, really. Can't wish it, really. Gotta just bottle it up and throw it in the ocean. Or Lake Michigan.

Besides, I don't time to fantasize about where I'm gonna be in a little over two years. I've got that big test coming up, and this girl's gotta focus. It's just me, and a big pile of books.

Delayed devotion

LISA
Hey, you coming to the Super Bowl party?

JEFF
Yeah. Are we rooting for Arizona?

LISA
Why would we root for Arizona?!

JEFF
Because that's where Michelle was born?

LISA
Dude! I was born in Pittsburgh! Nice knowing which friend you're more loyal to...

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Funny thing is, I was rooting for the Steelers this whole time because Lisa told me to. So now I feel obligated to watch tonight (even though I have a test tomorrow) and root for the underdogs. GO CARDINALS!