There's an elephant sitting on my chest

I feel like I'm in med school all over again. I'm having trouble breathing and I constantly feel like I want to vomit. I'm having so much anxiety about starting my neuro/medicine/pediatrics months, it's almost as though Dr. Meanie Bikini is standing over my shoulder barking pimp questions at me.

And I'm getting them all wrong.

Because for all my bravado and outward self-confidence, I'm freaking out. I don't remember anything non-psych. I'm been joking that I'm just going to give all my patients Haldol and that'll solve all their problems, but the truth is, I don't even remember how to order maintenance IV fluids.

ME

I should probably review some neuro, huh?

MARTIN

Sure, why not?

ME

I'm so not looking forward to five hour rounds and "let's play Localize The Stroke!!" Man, I hate that game.

MARTIN

I'm sure you'll be fine. You'll remember more than you think.

ME

Hm, how many cranial nerves are there again?

MARTIN

[stares in disbelief]

ME

No seriously, crap, what's the first one? It's the nose one. Occulonasal? Oronasal? Oh shoot, what's the name! I remember it, I do! It comes out the cribriform plate and is associated with Kallman's syndrome...but shoot! What's the name??

MARTIN

You're hurting me.

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P.S. The answer's olfactory. And there are twelve cranial nerves. Bottom line: I'm going to die on my non-psych months. Seriously, I need some Xanax.