Laugh if you want, but I'm totally serious! Ask my roommate and best friend. She's seen the proof.
Seriously, I don't even understand how this works physiologically, but five minutes into any type of vigorous activity, as soon as I start sweating out my pores, my legs and arms are overrun with hives.
This morning, the Boy and I were running a little behind schedule. He had a shuttle to catch, and I was dragging my feet, because honestly, who wants to go to four hours of neurology lectures? (That was rhetorical, so please don't chime in about how neuro is SO cool and how the brain is the most awesome thing in the whole wide world, second only to the SOLAR SYSTEM and DINOSAURS, but the brain is so awesome, everyone should go into neurosurgery! - and yes, Martin, I'm looking at you - because I absolutely abhor neuroanatomy pathways.) Anyways, he was walking REAL fast, and even my long legs couldn't keep up with him.
Martin
Michelle! Come on! I'm going to miss the shuttle.
[And now, imagine me, huffing and puffing away, like a little old woman with emphysema, as I try to keep up, but getting farther and farther behind.]
Me
Go. Go without me.
Martin
What?! I can't do that. Come on! Just a little faster.
Me
No. I can't. Walk. Any. Faster. It's okay. I promise. Just go. Leave me.
Michelle! Come on! I'm going to miss the shuttle.
[And now, imagine me, huffing and puffing away, like a little old woman with emphysema, as I try to keep up, but getting farther and farther behind.]
Me
Go. Go without me.
Martin
What?! I can't do that. Come on! Just a little faster.
Me
No. I can't. Walk. Any. Faster. It's okay. I promise. Just go. Leave me.
And after some more prodding, Martin took off. After all, the shuttle only comes once an hour, and goodness knows he couldn't be late. There were babies to be birthed, people! And so I watched him become a smaller and smaller speck in the distance, and then I realized that he had my umbrella.
A lot of colorful words went off in my head, as I tried to decide if I really needed it. Answer: yes, because the weathermen were predicting severe thunderstorms throughout the day, and if there's one thing I hate more than exercise, it's being dripping wet. And my hair looked good today.
So somehow, I reached in and grabbed all the energy inside me, and sprinted down the sidewalk to catch up.
Sprinted, people. Yes, I freaking ran. And I had a fifteen pound weight whacking my right thigh with every step too. (Which made for a nice beautiful purple bruise later, thanks computer!)
We made it on time of course - him to his shuttle, and me to my lecture hall a full forty minutes early. Which was thankfully empty. Because as soon as I got in there, I downed my large iced coffee, stripped off my scarf and sweater and just sat there, drowning in sweat and hives.
I really don't know why I'm telling you this story. Except to emphasize that I'm really out of shape. And I really am allergic to exercise.
A lot of colorful words went off in my head, as I tried to decide if I really needed it. Answer: yes, because the weathermen were predicting severe thunderstorms throughout the day, and if there's one thing I hate more than exercise, it's being dripping wet. And my hair looked good today.
So somehow, I reached in and grabbed all the energy inside me, and sprinted down the sidewalk to catch up.
Sprinted, people. Yes, I freaking ran. And I had a fifteen pound weight whacking my right thigh with every step too. (Which made for a nice beautiful purple bruise later, thanks computer!)
We made it on time of course - him to his shuttle, and me to my lecture hall a full forty minutes early. Which was thankfully empty. Because as soon as I got in there, I downed my large iced coffee, stripped off my scarf and sweater and just sat there, drowning in sweat and hives.
I really don't know why I'm telling you this story. Except to emphasize that I'm really out of shape. And I really am allergic to exercise.
