Call me back otherwise I'll deport you

I've been taking care of an old Asian grandpa. He came in with acute confusion, unable to talk to anyone. The ER note said that someone from his family dropped him off, and no one had been back to see him in days.

We put a foley in him and out came three liters of urine. I sent off labs, and his PSA came back sky high. Urology came by to see him and confirmed my suspicions: most likely prostate cancer. We needed to talk to the family to decide what they wanted to do.

I called the family.

I called the family again.

Every day for three days I would try calling the family, before rounds, during rounds, after rounds, before lunch, after lunch, while I wrote notes, before signout, after signout. No one ever picked up. And every time I would leave a message.

The voicemails started off pleasantly. "Hi, this is Dr. Wu, and I'm taking care of your family member. He's doing well, but please give me a call back so that I can discuss his care with you."

But as the days passed, and my messages went unanswered, I got more and more terse. "Hi, this is Dr. Wu, and it is imperative that I speak with you about your relative's care."

I started leaving messages on my patient's tray table and white board, imploring the family to call me the minute they came to visit.

Still nothing.

This was inappropriate. Someone had dumped their grandfather in the hospital and taken off. Who does that? Seriously, who does that?!

I was pissed.

So on the third day, when my patient started to get a little worse, I called the family one last time. It went to voicemail. Of course.

"Hi, this is Dr. Wu, and this is now my twentieth voicemail to your family. It is highly inappropriate for you to send your grandfather to the hospital and then not want to participate in his care, especially when he is unable to voice his needs at this time. This qualifies as a form of neglect, and if I do not hear from you by the end of the work day, I will have no choice but to report your family to Adult Protective Services. Again, you know how to reach me."

I slammed the phone down in disgust.

I sat down at the nursing station, unsure what to do next for my patient. I was calling in a social work consult to try to get my patient placed at a nursing home, when the phone started ringing. The nursing supervisor picked up, and all I could hear was her side of the conversation. "Oh! Yes! Thank you for calling, the doctor has been trying to get a hold of you! No? No, just hold on, she's right here and you can talk to her right -- oh what? Mmhmm. No? Oh okay, good to know."

I almost yelled at her. That was the family I was trying to track down on the phone for days! Why did she just hang up?

Then she turned around.

"Doctor Wu? The family that you've been calling for the last three days? They're a Spanish speaking only family who just had their neighbor translate all of your messages. They said they don't have a relative in the hospital, but they got very concerned when you mentioned going to the police, so they want to know what they have to do for Mr. Chen."

I turned beet red. Turns out the number in my patient's file was wrong this whole time. And I had unknowingly been harassing a very nice Hispanic family who were now afraid of being deported if they didn't come to take my Asian patient home.