Wrapped in bright blue tissue paper and a giant bow, it was my belated birthday present to myself. It was my coat that I had drooled over and spent endless time debating whether or not to get, before I did eventually give in and plunk down my hard-earned government-loaned money.
And there it was! With the big brown buttons! And the cute collar plus bow!
Except it wasn't.
The middle button was the only one with an amber jewel. And while it looked charming on the original design, in person it looked like the other buttons' "amber accents" had fallen off and been misplaced with these huge brown things that didn't really match. And there was no structure. The heavy wool winter jacket I'd been expecting was actually more like a lightweight fall cover-up.
But though my excitement was dampened, I still had hope that it would be totally cute. So I tried it on.
Now, I've never worn a burlap sack before, but I imagine this must be what it looks like.
The jacket made me gain twenty pounds, in all the wrong places. The arms were too short and I looked as though I were pregnant or smuggling watermelons. Smuggling something. I have no idea what the material is made out of - supposedly "wool" - but it made me itch as though I had a bad case of lice (which, I haven't ever had, but again, I imagine that is how it must feel like).
Needless to say, I'm going to have to return it.
But hey! They sent me a free gift with purchase! Something that was "mind in china." Awesome.(Seriously, I swear that's what it says at the bottom. I'm even posting a picture to prove it.)
Oh the best part? I went back to the website to see how to return my coat, and then I found out that they had restocked...and the coat is now available in my size. So now I have to decide if I want to return it or merely exchange it. My head is about to explode with all the back and forth. Cute bow and buttons! No, it looks like a burlap sack! But maybe it only looks like a burlap sack because it's in the wrong size! Exchange it! Return it! And so on.
Again, I should really be studying. Or sleeping.
